We first met when we were teenagers (maybe 17 or 18?), two young lesbians in the Mosaic Youth Chorus in Denver, surrounded by the chaotic, joyful overlap of friend circles and dating pools that often define queer communities.

Our worlds tangled together through choir rehearsals, hangouts at Rainbow Alley (Denver’s drop-in center for LGBTQ+ youth), and carpools that became rituals: Hillary picking up Sebastien on the way to choir, stopping at Stella’s for coffee, and ending the night NOT dancing (neither of us enjoy it) at Denver’s big gay club, Tracks.

Our friendship wove itself through those years— Sebastien (and sometimes their brother) frequented parties at Hillary’s house in Boulder during her college years.

Even when distance made communication irregular when Hillary moved to MA for grad school (and Hillary remains a famously terrible texter), we never fully drifted. The two of us reconnected whenever Hillary came back to Colorado to visit, usually at Charlie’s, the beloved gay country bar that became our unofficial reunion spot.

Fast forward many years to October 2020, during the strange stillness of the pandemic, Sebastien sent a casual Facebook message—one of the many check-ins over the years. This time, for reasons neither of us can completely explain, Hillary actually replied. When they got a response, they were surprised that it felt different this time around. We both expressed a familiar sense of safety with one another, especially during the uncertainty of COVID. The conversation that followed didn’t stop. When Sebastien got COVID that November, Hillary cared for him from afar, sending groceries, meals, and hours of company over the phone. Somewhere in those long, late-night calls, we realized this was something special.

So in December 2020, Hillary flew to Denver for Christmas, and from that moment, we simply stayed together.

Thanks to the remote world, Hillary spent February through August 2021 living with Sebastien in Denver.

When her job required a return to Massachusetts that fall, Sebastien knew he had to go with her. So we packed up our lives—one car stereotypically pulling a U-Haul and the other lovingly chauffeured by Hillary’s mom with two of our cats inside—and made the 2,000-mile, three-day drive from Colorado to Massachusetts to begin the next chapter. Talk about former-lesbian energy!

In May 2022, Sebastien proposed on a sun-washed rock outcropping overlooking the Atlantic in Acadia National Park. He didn’t have a traditional ring—just a couple of tiny hair ties from work—because he knew Hillary wanted to design her own. Hillary also proposed on this day, with the second hair tie. And it was perfect.

We decided to get legally married before Trump got inaugurated for the second time. It was important to both of us that we got married in Colorado, so we went to the courthouse in Castle Rock. Afterwards, we had celebratory tequila shots and tacos and finished the day with a wonderful celebration with our immediate family.